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Dear World: I Am Sorry

February 22, 2011

(Originally from Feb 17, yes I start writing my blogs days ahead and publish after editing)


Why am I sorry today. Well, I am sorry for the Van Dyke Accent.

Well first off, I want to say hats off to America, the land of opportunity. Not only can you get a higher education with opportunity grants, get a home loan you cannot afford with government backed laws and  get your fill of freedom of speech…this country welcomes actors of all nationalities into Americans in films.

From the new 2012 Spiderman, the Dark Knight, House MD, and so much more we welcome foreigners to portray American characters. And I must say, most of their American accents are pretty good! I don’t care who is cast in a film as long as they are good and play the part well. Kate Winslet, Jude Law, Heath Ledger, Ewan McGregor, Christian Bale, Catherine Zeta Jones, Gary Oldman, Hugh Laurie. The list can go on and on! If I were not sleep deprived I would carry on the list. But anyways, I do not believe in “Americans for American roles only” after all we are the melting pot. If an American is good then cast them, if not get someone else, end of story. So all actors: Scottish, English, Welsh, Irish, Australians, New Zealanders, South Africans are all welcomed to play Americans. (Canadians sound like us so we can play each other conversely)

That being said, there is a problem when Americans are cast as foreign characters. There is a good reason why Americans should 9 out of 10 times NOT be cast as anything BUT Americans and that is that they cannot do the accents. Hence, the title of this post. I am SORRY for the Americans who have butchered the accents of our English speaking cousins. I can name a few guilty US actors of this travesty! As I watch them in films with their insufferable and ridiculous “Allo” “what’s all this then?” “good dAy mAte” (ala Crocodile Dundee with a huge emphasis on the A) I want to hide under my a rock in shame , as I look up into the heavens and ask WHY? Why have they done this to us? Why did the casting agents cast these people? Why go for the American who has no clue about what they are doing? Or have too much ego to think they can pull it off? Unless you are Johnny Depp, Meril Streep or Robert Downey Jr and maybe a few selected others, then just say NO and stick to a good US film. Why not be happy in a good LA, New York movie?

I think this is one of my hate list items. Actors who think they can pull accents off and the film crews who let this travesty occur.

Now, I present to you some of the most ridiculous accents I have every heard. I am sorry!

Demi Moore = WTF

Julia Roberts WTF moment of Irish with Southern US accent

Keeanu Reves= the ACTUAL definition of the worst accent in the world: I laugh at this so much! I fast forward through all of his scenes. Winora Ryder is not that good herself in this film either but Reeves take the cake.

Christian Slater and Kevin Costner in Robin Hood Prince of thieves= WTF

Listen to Christian Slater who seems to remember he has a terrible accent 5% of the time then gives up and speaks in his normal US accent. Kevin Costner didn’t even try and you know what? Maybe it was better that he didn’t. Would have ruined the film, which in itself is a good film.


But it is not always Americans who mess up with the accents:

Highlander. I love this film. Ah, the irony of the makers having cast the Scotsman as a Spaniard and then the Frenchman as a Scotsman. Bet they told Sean Connery not to sound Scottish, that’s what Connor Macleod’s Frenchaccent is trying to do (Embedding disabled but watch on youtube) :

Dishonorable mention: Austraian Actor Mel Gibson’s Bravehart accent was voted the WORST Scottish accent in cinema history:

In a way, maybe we should look past the accents and focus on the film. After all as awful as Keanu Reeves is, B. S’s Dracula is an amazing film.


No Mention:

Random clip of Shrek’s dad:



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